Doug Thorburn


Alcoholism Myths
and Realities

Removing the Stigma
from Mankind's Most
Destructive Disease

How to Spot
Hidden Alcoholics:

Using Beahvioral Clues
to Recognize Addiction
in its Early Stages

Drunks, Drugs & Debits:
How To Recognize
Addicts and Avoid
Financial Abuse

Get Out Of the Way!
How To Identify and
Avoid a Driver Under
the Influence

TAR Lite
What Would You Do?
A Humorous look at addict antics

Published frequently by Doug Thorburn



#037 - June 18 (What would you do…if you want a pizza at 11:40 pm on a Sunday, don’t have
any money to buy one—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?
#036 - June 10 (What would you do…if you struck a 5 year-old boy with your car—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?
#035 - June 4 (What would you do…if your adult kids confront you for stealing two cans of
beer from their front porch cooler without asking—and you have alcoholic


#034 - November 6 (What would you do…if you wanted a drink at a bar but the bartender refused to serve you—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?
#033 - November 6 (What would you do…if you have to drive a group of wet kids home from a nearby public pool—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?


#032 - November 7 (What would you do…if you prepare income taxes out of your home and feel harassed by clients calling you at all hours—and you (likely) have alcoholic biochemistry?
#031 - November 4 (What would you do…if you crash your car through the front of a pharmacy in the wee hours of the morning—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?
#030 - November 1 (What would you do…if you’ve been gambling and drinking at a local casino until 10:30 pm, you feel like taking a swim—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?
#029 - October 30 (What would you do…if your driver’s license was revoked, you needed to travel 600 miles to your brother’s wedding—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?
#028 - July 1 (What would you do…if you think your neighbor’s grass is too tall and scraggly—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?

#027 - June 25 (What would you do…if during a bike ride near a church-sponsored picnic in a campground, while carrying some extra meat, you run across a black bear—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?
#026 - June 20 (What would you do...if your parent’s home (where you currently live) is burglarized and you need someone to blame—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?
#025 - June 5 (What would you do...if you want to take the wedding ring off your finger, it won’t come off easily—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?)
#024 - May 22 (What would you do...if you are waiting behind someone you think is taking too long to pick up their food at a drive-thru — and you have alcoholic biochemistry?)


#023 - December 4 (What would you do...if as the mother of a blind student you’re warned by the school superintendent about the school van driver’s background (over whose employment the superintendent has, inexplicably, no control), which includes at least three serious driving offences, including a DUI and reckless driving 12 years ago and another unspecified serious offense three years ago—and you don’t have a clue about addiction?)
#022 - October 9 (What would you do...if you like your music really loud, but you’ve got neighbors who are really close — and you have alcoholic biochemistry?)
#021 - September 27 (What would you do...if it’s late at night when you begin to suspect your wife is cheating on you, you want to talk but she’s asleep, you’re a convicted felon—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?)
#020 - September 18 (What would you do...if you’re driving drunk and hit an object on the interstate—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?)
#019 - September 12 (What would you do...if you’ve crashed and a rescue crew and some cops are using the Jaws of Life to free you from your vehicle—and you have an addictive biochemistry?)
#018 - September 5 (What would you do...if a woman rejects your advances at a bar — and you have alcoholic biochemistry?)
#017 - August 28 (What would you do...if you’re driving your truck on a hot early evening, your dogs need to be cooled down and the truck needs a wash—and you are drunk off your ass?)
#016 - August 21 (What would you do...if you come home to find your live-in girlfriend has posted the photo of another man on her Facebook page—and you have alcoholic biochemistry?)
#015 - August 1 (What would you do...if you are driving drunk, feeling sleepy—and have alcholic biochemistry?)
#014 - July 24
(What would you do...if you caused an automobile accident, possibly resulting in injuries?)
#013 - July 10 (What would you do...if it’s nighttime, you are drunk, your car has a flat and no headlights, your cat is desperately hungry and you have no cat food?
#012 - June 19 (What would you do...if you found out your two sons, ages 12 and 13, drank some
of your booze and you decided to teach the kids a lesson about the possible dangers of drinking?
#011 - June 11
(What would you do...if you are coming down from a high on meth and you are ready to crash but you aren’t close to home?)
#010 - June 5
(What would you do...if your tan is fading, you don’t have time to tan the old-fashioned way and you would like to drive to a tanning salon but your 6-year old girl and 10-month-old boy are in the car with you?
#009 - May 30 (What would you do...if you need to leave your 7-year-old daughter with a babysitter for the day? )
#008 - May 22
(What would you do...if your kids left your granddaughter with you for the day and, like grandparents everywhere, you want to have fun with her?)
#007 - May 16 (What would you do...if you desperately wanted a copy of the latest Playboy magazine?)
#006 - May 8 (What would you do...if you were mailing a package containing hallucinogenic mushrooms and other controlled substances to your daughter in another state?)
#005 - May 2 (What would you do...if a 19-year-old member of your family runs a red light, fails to pull over for officers, leads police on a high-speed chase on the streets of Los Angeles, pulls over and threatens officers with what appears to be a gun, and then gets shot to death by police?)
#004 - May 1 (What would you do...if you’re pulled over for running a red light but, although you’ve always wanted to become a cop, you’re afriad of the police?)
#003 - April 27 (What would you do...if you’re checking into a juvenile detention center and approaching the security checkpoint with pot in your pocket?)
#002 - April 25 (What would you do...if you faced drug trafficking charges and were making your first court appearance? )
#001 - March 21 (What would you do...if you’re driving to court for a preliminary hearing on possession of methamphetamine?)

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