Trying to reason–and then realizing, he’s an alcoholic
Dear Doug: Out of control ex-employee
Dear Doug:
When I recently terminated an employee, he suddenly became very hostile. When I asked hm to calm down, he screamed and hurled insults. I am so shaken up by this I worry about a recurrence in future terminations. What could I have done to set the stage for a calmer parting of the ways?
Signed, Terminator
. . . . . .
Dear Terminator,
Other columnists might point out that storms often begin after being asked to calm down. They may suggest that you maintain your composure and tell the departing employee that any discussion is over if the screaming doesn’t stop immediately, and that you should walk out and seek help from other staff if necessary. This would be excellent advice.
There could also be a suggestion that the situation might have been prevented with frequent feedback, guidance, goal-setting and regular communication. Because it wouldn’t be a shock to the employee who has been given a clear idea of the results of poor performance, you wouldn’t become the target of such rage on those rare occasions when firing is the only option. However, such rage paints a picture of someone with whom we cannot rationally deal: a brain-damaged individual.
Screaming and insulting others is a significant indication of a lower brain center unrestrained by the neo-cortex, the seat of reason and logic in civilized humankind. Since addiction damages the neo-cortex, we should give the benefit of the doubt for out-of-control behaviors to alcoholism. After all, the person is either a lunatic, or an alcoholic. Such extreme misbehaviors are exceedingly rare in sober people.
The crucial point in prevention, then, is to learn the identifying behavioral symptoms of alcoholism, preferably before becoming involved personally or professionally. Since this isn’t always possible in the limited contact before hiring, early identification is essential, preferably at a time when it will be easier to terminate the employee. In any case, when anyone is suspected of having alcoholism, copious notes regarding on-the-job misbehaviors are crucial, as is having at least one other person present during the termination process.
Guidance does nothing for a damaged frontal lobe. Reason is worthless when dealing with the pre-civilized impulses of the basal ganglia and emotional response of the limbic system. Reason and guidance only serve to allow the addict to further inflate his or her ego by reacting against logic and guidance with unreasonable demands, violation of rules and ignoring rational suggestions.
(Source for story idea: Los Angeles Daily News columnist Ken Lloyd, “What to do when a fired worker gets angry,” March 7, 2005.)