The General Petraeus affair: everyone involved except for Petraeus shows numerous behavioral indications of addiction. Petraeus may be an unaware codependent.
Gen. David Petraeus’ Biographer Paula Broadwell and Socialite-Friend Jill Kelley:
Possible Alcoholics are Enmeshed in Positions of Power
The story is worthy of a soap opera or “The Real Housewives of New Jersey”: a highly respected General (also former director of the CIA) has a 10-month affair with a woman who, becoming obsessed with him, sends another woman, who she believes is flirting with him, threatening emails. Most people probably think, “it’s not real,” or “whatever.” However, there’s a lot more to this story, which should be taken very seriously by concerned citizens because it’s all-too real—and its likely genesis is all-too common.
A core theme of my work, from Drunks, Drugs & Debits (which we are selling to subscribers for $1 each plus shipping costs through January 31, 2013; email sales@galtpublishing.com) to Alcoholism Myths and Realities and this Report, is that addiction-aware observers can spot alcoholism-induced misbehaviors long before addictive use is ever proven. We can do this because alcohol and other-drug addiction causes distortions of perceptions and memory, as well as egomania. Very high odds of addiction can be ascribed when seemingly idiotic or unnecessarily risky behaviors are observed (caused by distortions of perception and memory), or when unethical or criminal acts are evident (as egomania compels the addict to attempt to wield inappropriate or capricious power over others). Another theme pervasive in my works stipulates that where we observe behaviors indicative of addiction, for our own safety as well as that of others we must assume its presence: addicts are capable of anything. Whenever we see “soap opera,” “obsessed” and “threatening,” we should look for addiction. In this case we find evidence for it in spades, even if we don’t have absolute proof.
Not everyone involved in these types of stories is an addict; non-addicts occasionally engage in unethical behaviors. General David Petraeus, 60, engaged in at least a modicum of such misbehaviors—he committed adultery. However, misbehaviors must be more evident to ascribe high odds of addiction. Such behaviors are apparent in the case of Petraeus’ biographer Paula Broadwell, 40—she became obsessive, possessive and threatening, committed adultery with a man 20 years her senior (she’s married to radiologist Scott Broadwell), appears arrogant, and seems prone to bragging about if not exaggerating her qualifications (as one columnist put it, “Margaret Thatcher once noted that if you had to tell people you were a lady, you probably weren’t”). Further, such misbehaviors utterly fill the lives of socialite Jill Kelley, 37, her husband surgeon Scott Kelley, MD and Jill’s twin-sister lawyer Natalie Khawam.
Jill Kelley’s contact with the FBI about allegedly hostile, graphic and threatening emails she received from Broadwell sparked the investigation that brought the Petraeus-Broadwell affair to light. Ironically, she also brought a lot of attention to her own misbehaviors. The Kelleys’ current residence, a palatial Tampa, Florida $1.8 million home has been in foreclosure since 2010 and Bank of America claims the Kelleys haven’t made a payment since 2009. They appear at some point to have taken equity out, since they owe more than $1.7 million on a home purchased for $1.5 million in 2004. A downtown Tampa office building, on which they owe $2.2 million, has also been in foreclosure since 2010. In 2010, Chase sued the Kelleys over the failure to pay a $25,000 revolving credit card debt while Regions Bank sued them over failure to pay $253,000 in credit card bills. All told, Jill and/or Scott Kelly have been the subject of at least nine lawsuits since they moved to Florida in 2004.
Financial distress is not uncommon after a real estate crash (Florida was especially devastated), which can bring down sober and non-sober individuals alike. The foreclosures by themselves do not give high odds of psychotropic drug addiction (psychotropic drugs are those capable of causing distortions of perception and memory in susceptible individuals); however, Dr. Kelley is apparently a well-known surgeon and, presumably, earns an excellent living. Lawsuits combined with financial distress in high income earners dramatically up the odds of substance addiction. Further, the fact that even under scrutiny the Kellys continue to live the life of Riley , remain in a home for which they are not paying and, until recently, held lavish parties for military brass give compelling odds that addiction explains (but does not excuse) the behaviors in one or both of the them. Additional clues are plentiful, even if they are unnecessary at this point for confirming very high odds of addiction.
There was only one tax filing (2007) for the Doctor Kelley Cancer Foundation, a non-profit listing only Jill Kelley, Scott Kelley and Natalie Khawam as trustees. The foundation, dedicated to “efforts to discover ways to improve the quality of life of terminally ill cancer patients,” listed $43,000 in meals and entertainment, $8,800 in travel, $25,000 in legal fees, nearly $9,000 in auto and $3,700 in office-related expenses even though the non-profit had no employees and was based in their palatial home. CharityWatch analyst Laurie Styron concluded, “The charity did not report that any of the…expenses were related to granting wishes to terminally ill adult cancer patients, as was its mission. With only three people on the charity’s board, two of them husband and wife, there was not enough independent oversight in place to ensure proper or efficient use of funds.” This smacks of incredibly poor judgment or, worse, fraud, the former of which is more common to addicts than non-addicts and the latter of which is the near-exclusive domain of alcohol and other-drug addicts.
The odds that psychotropic drug addiction explains one’s life are dramatically increased by seemingly trite misbehaviors. While there is no evidence of the Kelleys making derogatory remarks about others, which has proven on numerous occasions to be a great first clue to addiction, a sign company, Signs Now of Carollwood, sued them over $2,200 in unpaid invoices for a huge banner advertising “executive suites” at their downtown office building. The Kelleys disputed the charge to their American Express card because the sign company submitted the charge under a name they didn’t recognize. When the company told them American Express had denied payment, the Kelleys told them to use the American Express Card dispute process to resolve the matter rather than fixing it themselves. Craig Lewis, the son of the sign company owner, observed, “That’s the loophole they tried to use. They owned a huge office building downtown. He’s a doctor, and she described herself as a socialite….How could this be a big deal to them?” Mr. Lewis, addicts revel in wielding power over others, even over relatively tiny things. If neither is an alcohol or other-drug addict, it makes no sense. If either or both are, all of their behaviors make sense, including accusing Signs Now of trespassing on their property to repossess the signs after Signs Now had called them weekly asking for payment for nearly three months. In court documents, the Kelleys claimed “The taking of the signs created a scene and breached the peace.” The judge, however, not only ruled against the Kelleys, but ordered them to pay the $2,200 plus interest.
Jill’s sister Natalie Khawam has exhibited behavior even more outrageous. Despite earning income of more than $300,000 in both 2010 and 2011, she filed for bankruptcy in April 2012, listing more than $3 million in debt, including $600,000 to a St. Petersburg, Florida man, $53,000 to the IRS and an $800,000 personal loan from Jill and Scott Kelley, with whom she now lives. She listed $694 in savings; it’s “unclear” where all that money has gone. In a custody battle over whether Khawam was fit to parent her 4-year-old son, the head of the CIA and U.S. Marine Corps four-star Gen. John R. Allen, praised Khawam for her “maturity, integrity and steadfast commitment to raising her child.” After her husband tried to get custody, Khawam began filing domestic violence allegations. The court disagreed over Ms. Khawam’s “maturity” and “integrity,” finding the accusations were “ever-expanding,” “sensational,” and “so extraordinary, and…so distorted that they defy any common sense view of reality.” After a litany of hearings and psychological evaluations the judge wrote, “Ms. Khawam appears to lack any appreciation or respect for the importance of honesty and integrity in her interactions with her family, employers, and others with whom she comes in contact….The court fully expects that Ms. Khawam’s pattern of misrepresentations about virtually everything, including the most important aspects of her life, will continue indefinitely.” The judge also wrote she displayed a “willingness to say anything, even under oath, to advance her own personal interests at the expense of others.” It’s doubtful that many judges have called out an attorney as, essentially, a quintessential liar, or that many Generals have ever come to the defense of such a person. This alone places General Allen under scrutiny for possible alcoholism. In addition, according to court documents, Gen. Allen lives an extravagant lifestyle that conceals “mountains of money owed to banks and credit card companies,” further increasing his odds of addiction. Further, the Pentagon is looking into 20,000 to 30,000 pages of possible “inappropriate communication” between him and Jill Kelley (“email-itis” is a modern form of “telephonitis”—addicts controlling others via continuous phoning—clue # 22 in the chapter “A Supreme Being Complex” in How to Spot Hidden Alcoholics). So, we have Khawam engaging in false accusations, enabled by a General who lives extravagantly while seemingly risking bankruptcy, carrying on with Khawam’s married sister. This appears to be a tangled web of addicts doing all they can to enable one another.
Moreover, Khawam had blown through four jobs in five years and had three failed engagements before marrying and then leaving her new husband. Serial jobs and failed engagements are each powerful clues to alcoholism; together they are compelling evidence. In one of her stints, she worked as a lawyer at the Tampa law firm Cohen, Foster and Romine and, after leaving, accused and sued the firm’s business consultant for sexual harassment. The firm’s founder, Barry Cohen (whose firm has also been sued by surgeon Scott Kelley), presented a “giant” stack of evidence accusing Khawam of fraud, in this case involving an apparent false accusation. In attempting to serve a subpoena on Khawam, Cohen’s process server noted that although four cars were in the driveway of the Kelleys’ home, with whom Khawam had by this time moved in, no one would answer the door. Several people came and went but wouldn’t say who they were; none would accept the papers. When a black SUV pulled in to the driveway, blocking his way out, and two men climbed out (apparently in menacing fashion) the server called 911. After he was told they were FBI agents, Jill Kelley came out of the home, screaming that the process server had assaulted her guests and employees. It appears that both sisters wield power via false accusations, the near-exclusive domain of alcoholics.
On another occasion, after complaining about reporters and asking Tampa police for help with trespassers and cameramen blocking access to her home, Kelley didn’t just act like an alcoholic—she sounded like she was under the influence. Speaking to a 911 dispatcher: “You know, I don’t know if by any chance, because I’m an honorary consul general, so I have involability [sic], so they should not be able to cross my property. I don’t know if you want to get diplomatic protection involved as well.” Aside from the fact that she made little sense, she engaged in hyperbole, as her “honorary” status invokes no special privileges and she is not actually a diplomat. Hyperbolic statements by media magnate Ted Turner were my first clue to his addiction.
Guide to Misbehaviors
(Check out the actual addiction report for this guide; the chart does not translate well to a blog.)
* Estimated odds of alcohol/other-drug addiction for any one behavior. To calculate the odds of addiction in any one person after the first alcoholic behavior is observed, as described in Drunks, Drugs & Debits: multiply the odds of any additional behaviors by the remainder percent and add to the previous percentage. Estimated odds cap out at 80% without proof of addictive use.
** Estimated odds of addiction in one party or the other; one may be codependent-victim.
***Estimated odds that either the person under scrutiny is an addict, or has been severly affected by one.
We can’t identify addiction in someone just because of who they hang out with. However, birds of a feather often flock together, especially when those birds are addicted ones. Ms. Khawam’s financial misbehaviors are not only beyond the pale, they make the tragic tales of financial abuse of others reported in Drunks, Drugs & Debits appear relatively benign. The odds that addiction explains her behaviors are not only exceedingly high, they are a textbook case. Identical twins share genes; studies have shown that when one has the disease the odds of addiction in the other are at least 50% (and there’s good reason to believe those studies are simply missing the rest). It’s crucial to keep in mind, too, that we give those who engage in misbehaviors the benefit of the doubt by assuming addiction to alcohol and/or other drugs and not other behavioral problems. While numerous characters in this scandal exhibit behaviors indicative of addiction, their closeness to the highest levels of power doesn’t contradict the possibility: as explained elsewhere they add to it. Due to the risk of blackmail (which no one is alleging), it also increases the odds that national security could be compromised. Aside from their relationships with Gen. Petraeus and Gen. Allen, Jill Kelley and Natalie Khawam ate breakfast at the White House on September 28 and lunch on October 24, mere weeks before Petraeus resigned after admitting to the extramarital affair. What better way to wield power over friends, family and co-workers than by getting close to a man like Gen. David Petraeus, not to mention the President? If we’re correct in diagnosing substance addiction in the other players, Petraeus, whose reputation will be forever tarnished, will end up as one in a long list of tragic non-addicted victims of alcoholism.