A “War of the Roses” romance
Story from “This is True”by Randy Cassingham, with his “tagline:â€
“THERE’S NOTHIN’ LIKE HOME COOKIN': ‘Now THERE’S a couple that knows how to fight!’ summarized an enthusiastic Reuters reporter, telling the story of a couple in Mexico who got into a spat in their Oxkutzcab, Yucatan, home. Like a scene from the movie ‘Mr. and Mrs. Smith’, the report says, the couple’s fight escalated from knives to guns to home-made bombs; their house was destroyed. Juan Espinosa was arrested and Irma Contreras was hospitalized with third-degree burns. Unlike the ‘Smiths’ the couple didn’t get a happily-ever-after ending: Espinosa said he was glad his wife suffered burns, and Contreras reported she was sorry she had not ‘hacked off his manhood.’ (Reuters) …Coming next fall, with Brad Pitt as ‘Juan’ and Angelina Jolie as ‘Irma’ in the amazing sequel….”
My tagline might have included Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor or Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith for a bit more realism, but that’s why Randy writes the taglines. While the story fails to mention heavy drinking, we know better. Alcoholics sometimes get together and make each other miserable. Their lives mimic bipolar disorder, with highs of spending sprees and sex alternating with lows of verbal and, occasionally, physical abuse. Like so many, this couple will likely kiss and make up, only to do it all over again. While next time they might make themselves eligible for a joint Darwin Award, their family, friends and neighbors no doubt hope they won’t get the opportunity.
(Story and tagline from “This is True,”copyright 2006 by Randy Cassingham, used with permission. See http://www.thisistrue.com for free subscriptions.)