Drunken guest beat up with candy cane
Alcoholic Antic-of-the-Month
“AND THEN, WHAT TO MY WONDERING EYES SHOULD APPEAR? A holiday gathering in Del Paso Heights, Calif., was interrupted when an apparently drunk neighbor crashed the party. As guests were milling around the front lawn, Donald Kercell, 49, allegedly pulled a knife and threatened the guests. When he allegedly started slashing people’s clothing, a guest decided to fight back with the only weapon at hand: a 2-ft candy cane Christmas decoration from the lawn, which he used to beat Kercell down. After the intruder was subdued, police arrived and charged him with assault with a deadly weapon. Police ruled the candy man acted in self-defense and no charges are pending against him. (Sacramento Bee) …Sure Kercell faces felony charges, but that’s nothing compared to what Santa will do to him.”
Hopefully, Santa will withhold all gifts until he decides to try sobriety. In the meantime, the guest might offer him some real candy cane for his early recovery, when alcoholics suffer their greatest craving for sweets.
(Story and tagline from “This is True,” copyright 2008 by Randy Cassingham, used with permission.)